Hopeless in Hants (2)

A woman whose child threw a tantrum in the supermarket made the grave mistake of threatening her son with a smack if he didn't behave. Nothing illegal there, you may think - except some sad off-duty Hampshire plod, taking a break between hiding behind bushes with a scamera and finding other excuses not to go out on the beat, promptly reported her to county social services, and two of its fellow wastes of space somehow found time in their 'busy schedules' to vist her and threaten her with further action.

It's now over 20 years since my aunt was robbed of her precious jewellery. Hampshire Police don't seem as keen to work off-duty in her case.

Hopeless in Hants (1)

Two blasts at my own excuse for a police 'service', Hampshire, today. First an incident when I was going shopping the other day, and saw a Talivan parked at the roadside. Nothing unusual there - we all know Grabby Gordoom needs the dough - but written on its side was 'Road Safety - Community Reassurance'. You what? 'Reassuring' us that the police have nothing better to do than skulk under trees just the other side of a hill and a long bend to raise money for this discredited government? Pathetic!

Regrettable?

Hampshire Police are refusing to apologize over their mishandling of the Teresa de Simon murder, for which an innocent man, Sean Hodgson, served 27 years in jail. David Lane confessed to the murder at the time, but HP somehow 'forgot' to pass this information on to Mr. Hodgson's defence team at the trial. Instead the farce have said that the incident was 'regrettable'.

Pathetic!

Hampshire down to 10 feet

Having failed to respond to a crime just 70 yards from one of their stations, Hampshire Police obviously decided to go one better by parking one of their cars in a diasbled bay with regular parking available just feet away. Their 'excuse' was that the officers were detaining an unlicensed vehicle, and thus couldn't travel such a great distance. Rather like the Met, one has to ask; how far will this force go?

But it's only public money....

I'm sure Lothian & Borders Police can explain why they spent an average of £147.31 per officer on that most vital of police functions, tea and biscuits, well ahead of second-placed Hampshire Police with a still massive £48.29 per officer (compare with the Met, being reasonable for once, averaging £3.84). Yes, there must be a really good explanation.

I'm waiting.....

Really, it's falling

Hampshire Police are annoyed that residents of Upper Shirley, tired of being victims and paying for a police service that doesn't serve them, have employed private security agents to protect them. They insist that crime in the county is really, really falling. I mean, how could local people fail to have confidence in such a force as Hampshire... oh...

Apologies

This story in late June I noted down, but lost the slip of paper so did not blog about it. But Hampshire Police will no doubt be delighted to know I have now found that paper. All they have to do is find the excuses as to why, having promised they would investigate the theft of a pony-trap from a house in Lyndhurst, they then waited four days before sending the owners a letter saying they were no longer interested in the case. They then said the letter had been sent too early (?), and an officer would come round and discuss the case (he didn't). Ah, you may say, but that's a country area, and they were probably many miles from the nearest police station.

About 70 yards.

Oops!

Appropriate?

Alex Marshal, chief constable at Hampshire Police, has been revealed to have claimed over £350 on eating out when he was at Thames Valley - oh, and 50p for a parking ticket. A spokestwat for HP described the claims as appropriate, but unfortunately did not say on which planet it would be appropriate. Mr. Marshall now earns nearly £150,000 a year.

Bastard!

Magic?

Two high-ranking Hampshire Police officers have been questioned about breaches of the Official Secrets Act. The Metropolitan Police, investigating the leak, refused to give any details, and have denied it is terrorist-related, even though it's being investigated by the counter-terrorist branch.

Strange, isn't it - when it's a celebrity arrest, somehow the press all magically find out and turn up to film it, but when it's a plod being investigated, the 'magic' doesn't seem to work....